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Thursday, July 15, 2010

St. Louis


An update from Nicole Parris...

It is very difficult trying to make decisions for Wrenn when her condition is so unknown. Her degree of severity, I am told, is the worst because she has a double mutation. It really makes sense for her to be seen by the experts so we agreed to have her flown to St. Louis. We will know the date within the next few weeks. The doctors there can perform their own tests and will hopefully put her on the list for a transplant, which is what she needs to be able to function in this world as a normal baby. As with any transplant, there are always risks of complications, infections, rejections and death while waiting. The unknown is so scary and I battle the ‘what if’s’ every single moment of the day. I question every decision I make and already wonder if flying her to St. Louis is the right choice. Wrenn’s doctor told me that I’ll live a life filled with guilt if I try and question every road I take should the outcome not be favorable. I wish I could just flip a coin but as one good friend recently said, “I know you won’t!”

Wrenn at 11 weeks with Mommy



Wrenn on the Fourth of July

230 comments:

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Amanda Kern on July 15, 2010 at 10:57 PM said...

We're all praying for Wrenn!!!

Laurie Medeiros Collins said...

She is a beautiful baby Nicole. Mom is on dialysis and could potentially be a transplant recipient. I am her caretaker and understand, as her daughter, about wanting to "flip a coin." As a mother, I would move heaven and earth for my two girls if I had to and I know you feel the same way about your children. I will keep your family in my prayers.

Becky on July 16, 2010 at 9:56 AM said...

I am praying for Wrenn and your family. I have added a post to my blog about baby Wrenn and linked your web site. Please know you have many prayers being lifted to The Lord from Virginia for you all!!!

Anonymous said...

Praying for your daughter and your family!

Anonymous said...

Nik, You are doing all you can so what else can a person do?!!!!! Wrenn has the most wonderful mom, dad and brother who are giving her all the love possible. Going to St. Louis is scarey for you I'm sure but from my understanding that is the only alternative for you right now. Oh how strong you must be and you look wonderful inspite of all this going on! Wrenn is so adorable and she will be gorgeous just like her mamma! Love and prayers, Sandy

laurennicolelove.com on July 22, 2010 at 8:53 AM said...

Nicole,

I admire your strength and courage and heart in all of this. I cannot fathom how draining and painful it has been, and continues to be. You are learning to be resilient in this process, and an incredible woman. Your whole family is in my prayers and I wish you comfort, peace and wisdom in decisions that need to be made. I feel as though I have no place to speak - but know that there is a community behind you who loves and cares and is here to draw strength from. I pray that you will find joy even in the darkest parts of all of this. You are loved.

- lauren xoxo

"So we fix our eyes not on the seen but on the unseen, for it is the seen that is temporary but the unseen that is eternal."

Anonymous said...

Stay strong and keep smiling. You and your daughter are so beautiful and you will both be in my thoughts.

Becca said...

Please know you and your beautiful baby are in my thoughts and prayers.

Anonymous said...

You're such a strong person, keep believing and know that you have so much support.

You'r daughter and family are in my thoughts

Anonymous said...

She's such a beautiful baby girl, and both you and her are incredibly strong going through this, I wish you the best and pray for success.

Kirsten ten Brink said...

The ten Brinks love and miss you Nicole, you and Jason are in our thoughts all the time. Wish you were next door again so we could do more for you. St. Louis isn't that far from Cincinnati, I'll be watching your updates to see when you get there.
xo, Kirsten

Lillian C on July 22, 2010 at 11:54 AM said...

You're so amazing - how strong you are! I'll be sending you & your beautiful baby all my best wishes and good will and hope and joy!

Anonymous said...

Praying for you and your miracle girl with all my heart.

OhMyHeart on July 22, 2010 at 11:56 AM said...

Wrenn! What a sweet name for such a beautiful, fragile girl. Trust your gut instinct and your love - I think they're the most powerful tools a mother can have. I'm sending positive and healthy vibes to you and your family!

Anonymous said...

Wren is gorgeous! Praying for you and your family, for comfort and healing and encouragement.

Caroline on July 22, 2010 at 11:57 AM said...

I don't know you, but I would like to extend my encouragement, prayers, and generally happy thoughts to you and your family. I hope everything goes well in St. Louis, and that your baby will soon be home and healthy.

Anonymous said...

Wrenn is such a beautiful child, and she deserves a wonderful life. You are so strong for going through this with your daughter, and every decision you are making is one more step in the right direction. NEVER EVER, doubt yourself. Your love for your daughter will shine through all the pain of this situation. From what I can tell, your daughter is a fighter and I pray that she will make it. All my love is with you and your family through this difficult time and beyond. You have such a gorgeous family, and know that God is always with you, helping you through every doctor visit, every sleepless night, and every scary moment.
You can do this! You are an amazing mother, and Wrenn is an amazing child. You both deserve the best from life, and I pray that you receive it. Stay Strong in spirit and health. :)

kxm on July 22, 2010 at 11:57 AM said...

Wishing you strength and sending you love as you travel this difficult road. Unfortunately, we can never know all the answers--you can only do the best you can to make decisions for Wrenn. It is clear that all your decisions are based in love and a desire to do what is best for her.

I hope a donor is found and all goes well so that Wrenn may have a long and happy life. All the best to you.

Anonymous said...

Best of wishes for you, your family and Wrenn. I hope she finds what she needs in St. Louis.

And, next time you're battling the "what ifs," just remember this one: What if she gets a transplant and lives to be a healthy baby.

Nigel Thortinson on July 22, 2010 at 11:59 AM said...

Nik, what a touching story of agony and hope. My prayer is that His will, will align with your will and our will, to see Wren through this and grow up to be an example to the world.

Peace, Luv and faith to you and yours

Nigel Thortinson

Amanda Hite said...

I pray that you and your family find peace in your decisions and strength in your journey. I pray that your beautiful Wrenn feel love every day and recovers in great health.

Anonymous said...

She is a beautiful baby! Stay strong and hopeful, and know that Wrenn and your family are loved and in my prayers!

Jared on July 22, 2010 at 12:00 PM said...

I can't begin to imagine what you're going through, so I won't try, but know that I said a prayer for you and your baby today.

Psalm 8:9-10 "The Lord is a refuge for the opressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you."

Heather on July 22, 2010 at 12:03 PM said...

Nicole,
I absolutely admire your strength and courage through all of this! You are such a great mom; an absolute picture of how I'd like to be when I grow old enough to have children of my own. You are both so beautiful, it breaks my heart.
Love and prayers! <3

Anonymous said...

Nicole,

I cannot begin to imagine what you've been through the past couple months. Your story and heart throughout all of this is truly such an inspiration. Please know that Wrenn and your entire family are in my prayers. I pray that you find overwhelming amounts of strength and peace within all this chaos and I pray healing over your beautiful daughter. You're a wonderful mother. Please never, ever give up.

Stay wonderful!
Allison

Anonymous said...

Sending much love, healing vibes, and prayers in your direction.

Anonymous said...

Sending warm thoughts and well wishes your way! I hope St. Louis opens new windows for a healthy start for Wrenn. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers.


What lies behind us and what lies before us
are tiny matters compared to what lies within us.
~Ralph Waldo Emerson

Anonymous said...

Nicole,

I admire your strength and ability to smile through this trying time. You are strong, and you've created a beautiful baby girl. Keep your head up, as this too shall pass. Kids are amazingly resiliant and tough. I have faith that everything will work out.

Anonymous said...

I couldn't imagine what all your family is going through right now and the great love and strength your family must have. I wish you and your family the best and I hope everything works out.

Niki Rudolph said...

Please know that mothers everywhere are crying with you, praying with you, and wrapping our arms around you. Wrenn is a beautiful gift. No matter what decisions you have had to make, you make them for the love of that adorable, little girl, so they are never the wrong decisions.

Hold Wrenn, and hold on to her strength. She looks like a fighter like her mommy.

Jennifer B on July 22, 2010 at 12:12 PM said...

Wrenn is so beautiful and curious! I will be praying for your family and the doctors and nurses today. Love to you and Wrenn!

Jennifer

Emily Jane on July 22, 2010 at 12:14 PM said...

I have to echo what Niki said - please know that people all across the continent are heartbroken at Wrenn's story, and are praying with all our hearts for her strength and healing. Stay strong, and know that your family are in my prayers.

Anonymous said...

Praying for you and you're beautiful baby girl. I hope for the best

Andrea said...

Wrenn is beautiful! I will keep you all in my thoughts and prayers. Every decision you are making is out of a mothers love to do what is best for your daughter, no wrong decisions can be made out of love.

Joy on July 22, 2010 at 12:19 PM said...

I have Wrenn in my heart!
Stay strong and know that whatever you choose to do and no matter the outcome, you did it trying to be the best mother possible.

You ARE the best mother possible :)

Anonymous said...

Nicole,
My heart is full of hope for you and Wrenn. Not only are you both beautiful, you are incredibly strong. I can only imagine the pain you both endure. I hope your journey has a happily ever after. I'll be thinking of you <3

Love, Nicole

Rhonda said...

Dear Nichole,
You are an inspiration to me. You are an amazing Mom. I wish you and Wrenn the very best. I'll be checking back for pictures of healthy, happy Baby Wrenn when all this is over. Keep the faith.

I can't imagine what you must be going through. Motherhood is overwhelming enough without health concerns...

Sending my love and support,
Rhonda, Mom of one in NC

Aphre said...

Wrenn is such a beautiful baby girl, and looks so content in Mummy's arms. I know no matter what we all say you will continue to question your every decision, but please remember that no decision that you make can be wrong if it is motivated by pure love, which in your case they all are.

I will remember you both in my prayers tonight. Good luck and God bless. xxx

Autumn on July 22, 2010 at 12:20 PM said...

We are strangers, however as a mother my heart goes out to you and your beautiful child.

She looks like a little fighter. Keep reaching inside yourself for the strength to fight for her and with her.

You are in my thoughts,

Heather

Anonymous said...

Niki said it all...sending you a big ole' hug and lots of warm wishes!! I will be keeping you and your family and especially beautiful little Wrenn in my thoughts and prayers. Stay strong and never doubt yourself. XOXO

Anonymous said...

Wrenn is in our prayers! As parents, I know this has to be overwhelming for you at times. I hope that God can give you strength and peace. You all are doing a great job at protecting and giving your beautiful baby girl all that she needs. Sending you virtual hugs and kisses for your sweet pea.
-Melissa

Nate St. Pierre on July 22, 2010 at 12:22 PM said...

Nicole, you and Wrenn are so beautiful together, and I LOVE her 4th of July outfit. :)

I've been through a fair bit of health issues with my little children, and the one thing that resonated with me in this post was the second-guessing. I know how hard that can be, and how as soon as you make a decision the fear and doubt starts knawing at you, asking if you're doing the right thing.

Let me tell you this. You ARE doing the right thing. You love that little girl, and you're doing the absolute best decisions you can with the information you have. NEVER doubt that you are giving Wrenn all you have to give. Ever.

I love your family, and I'm praying for you.

Nate

Anonymous said...

My heart goes out to you and your family. I know the stress and pressure must be immense. I am praying for Wrenn now. She looks like her mommy! I pray that you both will be strong and fight. Some day, she will know that all of this happened so that she could live a special life and make an impact on the world around her. I know that in order for her. Blessings for you all!

Gnetch on July 22, 2010 at 12:23 PM said...

I admire your strength. We will all be praying for baby Wrenn and I know she is going to get better. Stay strong.

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you and your family.

trulytrayce on July 22, 2010 at 12:24 PM said...

What a beautiful, strong little girl!! Sending you much love, many prayers and blessings for strength, positive thoughts and healing!

Elizabeth Kaylene on July 22, 2010 at 12:24 PM said...

It's very obvious that you love your daughter, and that each decision you make is out of that love. You could never make the wrong decision like that.

I hope that the hospital in St. Louis is able to give you and Wrenn all the care and more that she needs to be healthy. I am thinking of you and your family.

*hugs*

Anonymous said...

You are all loved.

"And now, Lord, what do I wait for and expect? My hope and expectation are in You." Psalm 39: 7

Kim on July 22, 2010 at 12:25 PM said...

i can't even begin what you are going through. I'm thinking and praying for you all. I admire your strength and unconquerable love. Take care. x.x..x

quinn on July 22, 2010 at 12:25 PM said...

your wee girl is such a beautiful baby, and she looks like a fighter. i admire you and your families strength, i'm thinking of you. you're her mum, trust your decision. *hugs* xo

Ginelle Flores on July 22, 2010 at 12:27 PM said...

Dear Nicole,
I can tell you are going through a lot of pain, and you are very stressed, but the good thing is that you are still smiling and thats the attitude you should always have, smile, smile, smile.
Problems are always going to be here, but the secret is to be hopeful.When you have hope you have everything. Keep hoping, and always be positive :)
Your family and specially Wrenn is going to be in my prayers.
Also... Wrenn is very beautiful and very strong!
Keep moving forward!! (:

If you have 20 minutes free, you should watch this video, it always helps me...
http://www.thedoorpost.com/hope/film/?film=4dd298f102c77b625cf37a9e7744ac68

Anonymous said...

Wishing you ultimate strength as you go through this. Follow your gut. A mother always knows deep in her heart what the right thing to do is. You have a beautiful baby girl and I wish all the best for you.

Matthew Carpenter on July 22, 2010 at 12:29 PM said...

Just wanted to say I love you all, and here's picture of a Rock Wren I found for you - http://www.flickr.com/photos/grrlscientist/2565121636/

Brandy C said...

Nicole,

I don't know you, however, I admire your strength and courage through out this trial. I can tell from reading your blog that you are an amazing woman and mother. I know it is easy to question your decisions, but remember, you are making that decision for a reason and your intuition as a great mother will not fail you. Wrenn is a gorgeous baby and is lucky to have you as a mother. Keep your head up and follow your heart. Even though she isn't able to express it, I can only imagine that she feels your love and warmth. Don't give up hope! There are a lot of prayers and energy coming your way. I know you and Wrenn will be in my heart and thoughts today...

Always, Brandy

Anonymous said...

Wrenn is soo adorable. Stay strong and think positive. Wrenn is lucky to have soo much support. Your family is in our prayers.

Gracie Bear on July 22, 2010 at 12:33 PM said...

Oh, that's rough. :( I hope and pray that God will provide everything you need here.

Anonymous said...

Praying for baby Wrenn and your family!

Kimberly Martin said...

I prayed for Wrenn and your family today.

Jamie on July 22, 2010 at 12:36 PM said...

Wrenn is beautiful and so are you! I can't imagine what you're going through but know that you're in my thoughts & prayers! He is the Ultimate Healer and nothing is impossible. He will give you strength & peace. You are stronger than you ever imagined! Lots of prayers going up for you, beautiful Wrenn and your family! xoxo
-jamie

sophanne on July 22, 2010 at 12:37 PM said...

You are the mama- whatever decisions you make will be the right ones. Sending hopeful thoughts to you.

susie @newdaynewlesson on July 22, 2010 at 12:40 PM said...

With something like this you can't wrestle with the what ifs.

I learned this from someone dying of cancer. She said if there was one thing she wishes she could teach people, it is to live in the present. Worrying about the what if's is a useless waste of time and energy.

You have to believe that things will happen as they should. You need to do your best to do the maximum for her and then release and let things fall into place.

The one thing that has been made so clear to me in the past few weeks is that we all need to live in this moment and appreciate every minute.

I wrote this after two recent tragedies and my point was that our present is our present.

http://www.newdaynewlesson.com/?p=3775

Lots of hugs and good wishes.

Shanna on July 22, 2010 at 12:43 PM said...

I'm sending you and Wrenn lots and lots of love!!!

Anonymous said...

I'm Praying for your family and your beautiful baby Wren. Good luck.
xoxo

Anonymous said...

Nicole -

I'm incredibly impressed by the strength you and your family have shown through these difficult months. I can't imagine how I would react, but I would hope to be 1/10th as resilient as you.

But please don't feel that you are alone through this - your family, God, the medical teams and host of strangers are supporting you and sending positivity to your gorgeous daughter. Rest on them, allow them to be strong with you, trust them to support you and Wrenn.

I'll keep you, your daughter, your family in my prayers. Please continue to be an inspiration for faceless strangers and for Wrenn.

Anonymous said...

Sending prayers for you and you're beautiful daughter!

Anonymous said...

I wish you so much health and happiness for you and your family. A family member getting sick, let alone a child, is one of the hardest things to face in life. I am am thinking of Wrenn, and I hope so much that her condition improves. Sending lots of love your way!

Michelle @ Give a Girl a Fig on July 22, 2010 at 12:50 PM said...

Hi Nicole...I have said a prayer for you and for your sweet baby, Wrenn...that you will have peace during this time of the unknown and that God will provide Wrenn with the lungs that she needs to breathe on her own. I will tell you what God told me one day as I worried about my son..."Don't you worry...I love him more than you do...and I've got him in the palm of my hand." I believe God has Wrenn in the palm of His hand, too... Peace and grace to you and your family as you persever through this struggle. And can I say...Wrenn has her mama's eyes!

Annisphere on July 22, 2010 at 12:57 PM said...

Wrenn is a beautiful little girl and you are an amazingly strong mother.

I cannot even begin to imagine the challenges you are both facing at the moment and am sending you love and support to help you through each day.

Anonymous said...

I, too, send prayers and healing energy. Remember, miracles happen all the time ~ please try to remember that when times get the hardest (maybe even spend some time visualizing her happy and healthy, it can't hurt to try!).

Anonymous said...

Angel blessings to you, sweet Wrenn and your family.

Cali on July 22, 2010 at 1:02 PM said...

Keeping you and Wrenn in my prayers. Stay strong, Nicole!

Anonymous said...

Please know that many people are thinking and praying for you and your family.

Best wishes and much love...

Becca on July 22, 2010 at 1:04 PM said...

Wrenn is such a beautiful, precious little girl! And her family is strong! You've got tons of support and prayer already, but here's one more post telling you so. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers!
<3

Rhonda said...

Sending much love and prayers for Wrenn and your family. Many people have said it here already...trust that what you are doing is the right thing, because you are following your heart, doing what you believe is the right thing for Wrenn. You have the love and support of many.

Anya on July 22, 2010 at 1:05 PM said...

praying for you and your sweet baby girl!! Y

jenn ryan on July 22, 2010 at 1:05 PM said...

Sending weller vibes from Northern, MI. Stay strong!

Lauren on July 22, 2010 at 1:13 PM said...

Nicole- You are such a strong mom going through all of this, I can't even imagine how hard it must be. No matter how hard it gets always remember that there's a group of people who love you so much. Praying for you, Wrenn, and the rest of your family. Love.

Unknown on July 22, 2010 at 1:16 PM said...

Nicole, you and your little girl are so beautiful. I will keep both of you in my heart and prayers - you are doing what is courageous and full demonstration of your love. I can't even imagine what you are going through right now - but please accept the prayers and compassion of those reading your blog. Apparently you and Wrenn have an army of believers.

Anonymous said...

I do not know you, and I do not know everything you are going through. From your writing I think you are brave, beautiful and stronger than most. Thank you for sharing your story with us- we are forever in your debt for being allowed to view this part of who you are. I am sending you support and love. Your journey is not yet over- thank you for sharing the road with us.

bubbleboo on July 22, 2010 at 1:24 PM said...

I wish I could do more than leave you this comment and promise to be thinking of you and praying for you. But that is what I will be doing.

Please know that your family has touched many people, and there are so many who really care about you and what happens with Wrenn.

What a beautiful little girl she is. I pray that she will one day be happy and healthy and at home with you where she belongs.

Much love xxx

Emily Pitts on July 22, 2010 at 1:29 PM said...

thinking of you and your family right now.

Anonymous said...

You and your sweet princess are in my thoughts and prayers! She is so beautiful and God has an amazing plan for you and your family! Stay strong and God bless you!

Athena Taylor said...

Nicole, what a beautiful and strong family you have! The universe showers blessings and love on you and your darling baby Wrenn!!

VT on July 22, 2010 at 1:33 PM said...

I have prayed and will continue to pray for you. Your story brought tears to my eyes ... The circumstances were different, but I remember when I thought my little one wouldn't make it.

Remember, you don't know God's plan, so all you can do is be faithful. You do all you can and leave the rest to a higher wisdom than ours. Don't beat yourself up over things you cannot control or information you didn't have at decision time. All you can do is be faithful. I have no doubt that you are faithful ... The rest is in the Lord's hands.

Kitty

RiceBallAttack on July 22, 2010 at 1:37 PM said...

The biggest "what if" will stem from "what if I didn't try every option I had?"
It will work out. You're so strong, and Wrenn's so beautiful! Good luck... when she gets older, she'll be so happy to have you for a mom.

Lizzie said...

My thoughts are with you and your little Wrenn. She's beautiful and looks to me like a very strong little girl with so much love around her.

Natasha and Jesse on July 22, 2010 at 1:37 PM said...

Wrenn and your family is in my prayers.

Steve said...

I'm sorry. I'm sorry that we live in an imperfect world, one that forces us to endure things like what you face now. The words "I'm sorry" don't express the sorrow I feel for you and your family. The tension in my chest, the difficulty of holding back the tears in my eyes. I admire your strength. I will be praying for Wrenn, her transplant and her health, as often as I think of her. I also will, of course, be praying for you, strength, peace, and all good things. I also hope and pray that you And Wrenn feel the blanket of love that God longs to wrap you both in.

Anonymous said...

My heart is breaking for you right now. Making all these choices in the best interest of your daughter is daunting, scary and all made with love.

I have two friends who have traveled your path with their children. One had a bowel transplant as an infant and is a happy, adorable 5 year now. The other is 20 months old and just had his 2nd liver transplant two weeks ago. The liver numbers are in the normal range now. So while waiting is very, very difficult the outcome is amazing.

Please know I am thinking of you and your beautiful girl. You do have the strength to make the right decisions because they are coming from a mother's heart.

Much love to all of you.

Anonymous said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. Wrenn is beautiful and I pray she will be healthy one day soon. Stay strong!!

colleen on July 22, 2010 at 1:45 PM said...

I am thinking about your family and sending positive vibes your way! Stay strong, stay hopeful, and keeping loving that beautiful little girl.

Ariel on July 22, 2010 at 1:49 PM said...

my thoughts are with you, what a hard situation to be in, sending loving and healing vibes your way and hope you have the strength to cope xxx

Todd M. Stephanuik on July 22, 2010 at 2:01 PM said...

Your daughter and family are in my thoughts and prayers! Stay strong, and if you ever need a pick me up, just look to the comments above. You're daughter is beautiful and surrounded by loving, caring, dedicated people. May the universe shine down on you and yours with much love and positive energy!

Anonymous said...

As a mother, my heart aches for you. I pray that you can find peace of mind and heart and strength to continue this journey. Be blessed!

Anonymous said...

You and your baby are so beautiful. Stay strong; we're all thinking of you and praying for you!

Anonymous said...

Nicole, you are a wonderful, loving, strong Mommy whom God has divinely appointed to love and care for precious Baby Wrenn. You are doing an amazing job of caring for her, and you are making the right choices, because they are the BEST choices you know. You just keep praying for guidance and the Lord will make His ways known to you. He will direct your steps. People all over this world are praying for you, your family and especially for Wrenn's HEALING. We are praying for and expecting a miracle, girl, so don't lose faith!!

If you don't know what else to do, just read these verses out loud, over and over...commit them to memory and repeat them every time you start to feel worry, despair, sadness, anxiety or any other negative feeling creep in!

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." (Deuteronomy 31:6)

"So do not fear, for I am with you;
do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." (Isaiah 41:10)

You are loved and being prayed over daily!
xoxoxo

Anonymous said...

Your little girl is so beautiful! I pray for good reports, and that the One true Physician touches her. Pray for your rest and strength to overflow this day and those to come.

Unknown on July 22, 2010 at 2:14 PM said...

She is beautiful and my heart is breaking for her and your family. But I am also prayering for you guys!

Ty Sullivan said...

Being a father of a 2 year old girl and of a relatively healthy child, my heart hurts when I hear of little ones who are off to a rough start because it can be any of our children at any moment in time.
My daughter was a twin and lost her sister before birth due to Turner Syndrome. The loss was devastating of course but the rewards of the miracle of just having a child are insurmountable.
You have a beautiful daughter in Wrenn and though the time is rough now, once it passes and she grows stronger you will look back on this time and value the bond you have grown and will grow with her.
We are here to send positive and healthy thoughts your way and know that Wrenn is on our minds and in our hearts.
The Sullivan Family, NYC

Anonymous said...

The best to you and your family - and God bless little Wrenn, whatever His plan with her life is.

Unknown on July 22, 2010 at 2:29 PM said...

Thinking of you and Wrenn today and every day. Your pictures are stunningly beautiful. Wishing you well and hoping for some great news to come to you and your family very soon. xo

Angela on July 22, 2010 at 2:34 PM said...

I'll be keeping your family and baby Wrenn in thoughts and prayers.
xo

Anonymous said...

Nicole,

I simply cannot imagine the pain and sorrow that you feel being faced with this terrible situation. I pray that God wraps you in a cloak of His love and wraps Wrenn in His arms and heals her. Your strength through all of this is amazing. Your darling girl is loved, and she knows it.

Praying for you all with all I have.

Anonymous said...

I cannot even begin to imagine what this is like for you and your family. All of you are in my thoughts and prayers and my family will be pulling for your beautiful daughter.

Toby Rose Deaver on July 22, 2010 at 2:43 PM said...

You are such a beautiful person! Your spirit is so simple and honest. If it be God's will, may He heal your little girl. And may you be comforted. Wrenn is precious. Prayers are being said for you and your baby from Texas.

xoxo

Lauren on July 22, 2010 at 2:44 PM said...

Best wishes to you and your beautiful baby girl.

Kate on July 22, 2010 at 2:44 PM said...

My prayers go out to your family! Love to you!

Anonymous said...

Nicole,
My daughter was a preemie born two years ago and she spent her first three months in the hospital on breathing aids. It was a terrible time where I felt exhausted, distraught and like my every nerve was raw. It is an impossible situation when you are wondering what the future holds for your child. It's hard to not be able to be there to mother your baby each minute while she is in the hospital and it is not even remotely fair that this is happening to you.
While each medical decision is excruciating, please allow yourself to do the best that you can. The doctors are right- you cannot second guess yourself. While your decisions matter, your love for her and your family matter more. God is in control even now. And it has been proven time and time again that prayers can heal. I will join in praying for Wrenn and you and your family. May God bless and heal those little lungs.

Anonymous said...

Sending prayers and love to you and your gorgeous baby girl!

Bre said...

Dear Nicole,
I have never met you, but I will pass on the message about your beautiful baby girl. I gave all that I can [college student,sorry :)] and I know my friends will as well. Best of luck to your family, no matter what happens know that you did all that you could to help Wrenn.
Love you.
Bre

marmotash on July 22, 2010 at 2:49 PM said...

God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers. ~Jewish Proverb

a little thing to give you hope... http://twitpic.com/27mzhf


Blessings and love !!!

Anonymous said...

Praying for baby Wrenn and your family !

Anonymous said...

Nicole,

You are doing all you can...i admire your courage. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Anonymous said...

I am praying for you, Wrenn and your family. I cannot even begin to fathom how difficult it must be to watch your sweet little girl struggle. Just know that you have a whole LOT of people that are rooting for Wrenn and sending a ton of good thoughts your way!

Anonymous said...

keeping thoughts of you all near my heart...and sending warm hugs of support your way.

Anonymous said...

*warm hugs*, love, prayers, and good wishes.

"God gives burdens - also shoulders."

Sending love and strength your way

Anonymous said...

She is beautiful. I will be thinking of you all.

Anonymous said...

Nicole, you and your child both are so beautiful. I will be thinking of you and making sure a say a pray for you and your family and especially your baby. I will keep you in my thoughts constantly. I know how hard this must be for you. But please don't give up. Your baby is beautiful. Please just remember that you have thousands of people thinking and praying for you baby's health.

Emma on July 22, 2010 at 3:40 PM said...

Sending warm and positive thoughts from across the Atlantic Ocean. Never give up!

Rissa on July 22, 2010 at 3:50 PM said...

She is absolutely beautiful. I can only begin to imagine how difficult it is not knowing how much longer you'll get to keep your precious little one. I admire your strength in facing this.

People in your life are right, you can't keep asking the what ifs. It will consume you if you spend all your time focusing on all the potential horrible things that could go wrong. Right now you are in the present, not the future. The future can change in the blink of an eye, so preparing for it too much is silly. It might turn out that the future you prepared yourself for never comes. So focus on now. Spend and love every minute you can with your loved ones, and focus on what you can do now and enjoy what time you have now. I know that in some ways its harder and scarier to not think about later, but in some situations it's a lot better for your mental health to do that. So breathe and enjoy the present while it's still here.

I'm gonna be praying for you and your family and your darling little girl.

Josh on July 22, 2010 at 3:56 PM said...

I wish you, your family and Wrenn much strength in these hard times you're going through and know that there are tons of people out in the world sending their love and support and thoroughly rooting for Wrenn! Stay strong!

JDavis said...

Nicole, I am sending you my thoughts, love, and prayers at this time. Wrenn is absolutely beautiful and I'll think nothing but positive thoughts for you.

Jessica on July 22, 2010 at 4:04 PM said...

I don't know if Wrenn is your first baby or not. But, if so, I know exactly how hard it is to anticipate their delivery only to find then struggling to breathe and hang on to life. I will keep you and Wrenn both in my prayers and wish the best for you. Stay strong for her. One day you will look back on these days with her and be astonished at how much you were able to handle.

PippaD on July 22, 2010 at 4:05 PM said...

Hi, you daughter is beautiful! I just wanted to let you know that I am thinking of you and your family and I know that you are going to have all the strength you need to get through this.

Hugs :0)

Angie on July 22, 2010 at 4:08 PM said...

Hi Nicole, Wrenn & family,


love, AngieI Just want you to know that I think about you all. you're in my thoughts and prayers, and to be honest I don't have a idea what to say to you. I'm not a mother, and I don't know what it's like to have a very ill child.. I just want you to not back down, don't
give up and always have faith.

Love Angie

Anonymous said...

I am sending you all of my love and thoughts during this tough time. Wrenn is a beautiful baby and I'll be praying for her, you, and the rest of your family.

Rach on July 22, 2010 at 4:16 PM said...

I cannot possibly imagine what you are going through right now but I admire your strength throughout Wren's troubles. Never doubt your decisions, you are giving her all you have to give, the world is filled with "what if's" but don't let that make you doubt yourself. I know you are a wonderful mum and you show so much love towards Wren.

You will both be in my thoughts. I hope tha tyou can get through this.

Rach x

Anonymous said...

You and you're baby girl are incredibly strong, and I have faith that you will push through this difficult time. My best wishes for you.

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry that this has happened to you. I know that families are forever, though, and that regardless of what happens now, your family will have the chance to be together forever in the eternities. You have my prayers.

God bless you.

Anonymous said...

we are sending up prayers for Wrenn, you, and your family. may God reveal Himself to you in this difficult, uncertain time; may you lean on nothing else but Him.

Nikki in AB, Canada said...

I can't imagine what you must be going through and how hard it must be to see your little girl have to fight so hard, but 3 months is already a long fight for such a little person...I don't think he's giving up!! She looks like a beautiful, tough little girlie!
Although we are strangers, I'm sending sun-shiny vibes your way and hoping with all my heart that Wrenn fights with all she has- I think she will!

Chin up! You are a beautiful, wonderful, strong mother and you are doing ALL you can for your baby girl :)

WendyP on July 22, 2010 at 5:02 PM said...

sending much love and many healing prayers to you and your beautiful baby from across the world in Australia.

Meredith on July 22, 2010 at 5:03 PM said...

Oh, my heart goes out to you, Nicole, and I pray for you to have peace and serenity as you navigate those tough decisions. Wren is beautiful, and I pray that she may heal fully. She already is a miracle, I know.

Anonymous said...

I can't begin to fathom how difficult this is for you and your family, but I admire your strength, courage, and faith through this all. You are an inspiration to many through this, and the portrait of what an amazing mother should be. Please know that through all of this, there are hundreds of people praying over you and your family, and that there are hundreds of people who love and care for all of you. I don't know you at all, we have never talked, but through looking at your posts I can honestly say you are one of the strongest women I have ever come across, and one of the best mothers I have ever heard of. Your family and yourself are in my prayers!

Jennie said...

What a beautiful little girl you have Nicole. I will be praying God's protection for baby Wreen and for his amazing peace for your family!

Anonymous said...

Wrenn is simply adorable and I think the strengh you are showing through all of this is amazing. I wish both of you all the best from England.
P.S. I highly recommend listening to the song "Fight Like A Girl" by Bombshel.
x

Literary Wino on July 22, 2010 at 5:22 PM said...

I can't imagine what you and your family are going through, but please know I'm thinking of you, and you and your beautiful daughter are in my prayers.

Matt Herman on July 22, 2010 at 5:23 PM said...

Hang in there and stay strong, we are all here for you.

Follow your heart and you will make the right decisions.

Lola said...

I'm hoping for Wrenn. Things will be fine.

Kate on July 22, 2010 at 5:38 PM said...

Prayers coming from Toronto, Canada!

Alex said...

You're doing all that you can for your baby girl and one day she will appreciate it (not that she doesn't already).

You will be fine. Lots of love and hope from California <3.

Sara on July 22, 2010 at 5:46 PM said...

What a beautiful little girl! Keep on staying strong -- love will get you through anything!

Anonymous said...

what a beautiful space you have made for you and your beautiful girl.

as a mother, my heart reaches out to you. may you continue to find the strength you never knew you had on this journey.

i will be keeping you all in my prayers, knowing that one more cannot hurt.

trust in yourself wonderful mama. and hope this day brings you some peace.

jen.

Anonymous said...

You are giving your beautiful Wren more love than so many babies recieve. You are an angel. Your desire to do only good for your baby girl is admirable and not enough parents feel the same way. Wren must be bursting with the purest form of love for you; the kind only babies can feel.
I hope that all goes well and Wren gets to grow up in a perfect mother's arms. She deserves it, and so do you.

Anonymous said...

Stay strong, honey. Your baby girl is so beautiful! I know you're struggling, and you're in my thoughts. You're giving your baby girl the best thing anyone can give her, and that is love. You're a wonderful mom!

Marie said...

Nicole and Wrenn,
My girls and I will be praying for you both. As parents we always wonder if we are doing the right thing. Your decisions are much harder than most. We all have to make our decisions from our hearts and know they were made with the best of intentions. Much love to you both.

Lizz said...

You are in my prayers - I admire your strength. I hope that someday in the future, when I am a mother, I will have your unfailing love and courage.
Thank you.

Toni on July 22, 2010 at 7:13 PM said...

Sending lots of love and prayers your way!!! Stay strong and know that lots and lots of people are praying for you and your sweet family!

Love,
The Chase Family in Arizona

Stacy on July 22, 2010 at 7:18 PM said...

You may not know the outcome of all of this, but the God of this universe does. Trust in His goodness, knowing that no matter what happens He is walking beside you and holding that precious little girl of yours. I pray for God's peace for you and your family and God's mighty miracles for little Wrenn!

Anonymous said...

May you and your family get the answers you are seeking in St. Louis. And may the doctors there be blessed with the knowledge and guidance that they need to heal your precious little one. Stay strong, and know that you will be blessed by our Heavenly Father for dedicating your life to saving hers.

Anonymous said...

Nicole, I am praying for you. If I could take whatever strength I have and send you some I would. You are a wonderful mom. I will keep you in my thoughts.

Wrenn, we hope you get stronger every day, okay?

Megan on July 22, 2010 at 8:04 PM said...

Wow, I cannot imagine the pain you are going through right now. But I pray to higher powers that your nerves are calm, that Wrenn is not in pain, and that the doctors choose the right path to help Wrenn get better soon! I live in St. Louis. If you need anything, especially homemade food, send me an e-mail and I will bring something to the hospital!! <3

Heidi Ho on July 22, 2010 at 8:09 PM said...

I CAN imagine what you are going through.... I have been there. With a different situation (my daughter was born with a rare brain condition and had surgery at one month of age). To put your child's life in another's hands is the hardest thing I've ever experienced. There is no way to know what is right, what is wrong. Just do the best you can and make the best decision in that moment and try not to second guess yourself. You WILL be doing your very best for your child. It is so hard. It changes you. But, it makes you stronger! Trust in that.

Wren is gorgeous and strong. Doctors are smart and will do their very best for her. All you can do is your very best. Rely on your support, allow others to lift you up or catch you when you need to fall...I wish I could be there to hug your right now. I know how hard it is...xoxoxo

Courtney @ Pizzazzerie on July 22, 2010 at 8:31 PM said...

Sending love and prayers and angel kisses to you and your sweet baby!

Anonymous said...

I'm thinking of you sending you all the best and brightest wishes.

Anonymous said...

Know that you, your family, and your beautiful little girl are being lifted up in prayer tonight. God has a plan for you to give you hope and a future.

Beth Bradburn on July 22, 2010 at 9:30 PM said...

What a beautiful baby. The world is a better place for all the love you are giving her. I will be holding both of you in my heart. - Beth

Ally on July 22, 2010 at 9:30 PM said...

your baby is just beautiful.
you have to be strong, all you can do is your best whether that be where you are or in st louis.

We are all praying and sending our love to you.

xox

Joy on July 22, 2010 at 9:32 PM said...

Nicole,
You are both so beautiful!! You radiate love!
Please know that your actions are guided..your decisions are the best for Wrenn...release any doubt and continue to focus on love throughout this process..You are loved beyond measure, even in the moments so full of pain you think you cannot handle it..you are loved..and you may access that abundance of love each and every moment..I think you are strong and courageous to be guiding your precious one during this time..Much peace..

Anonymous said...

Wrenn is beautiful. Im sure God will protect this beautiful baby girl :)

Michael Madman on July 22, 2010 at 9:56 PM said...

We are praying for Wrenn

Anonymous said...

Hi Nicole

I have just, by complete fluke, found this blog post. My heart breaks for you. You say that you are torn on what to do, I say fight tooth and nail. Don't flip that coin take control...your strong enough for the both of you, believe that because it's true.

I am not a religious person, I am a person of science. Energy is neither created or destroyed, it only changes form...I'll be giving you and your beautiful baby all the energy I can.

Anonymous said...

I know what that hospital roller coaster feels like - but when you hit the low points remember that the ride is not over! Clinging to the loved one you are with helps, so does screaming once in a while! At the end of that rollercoaster is a feeling of exhiliration, pride that you survived, new found strength in doing what you thought you couldn't,and of course - pure relief the ride is over. You have a strong and beautiful daughter, everything will turn out fine!

Mathilde on July 22, 2010 at 10:23 PM said...

I wish i could give you one of those comforting hugs and tell you that everything is going to be ok. You're a beautiful mother and you have an even more beautiful daughter. During those hard times, it's not always easy to stay positive but we are now hundreds behind you, supporting you, making your prayers stronger. Wrenn is lucky to have such a wonderful mother. And there is no way you can ever go wrong by loving her the way you do.

SoulSophistication on July 22, 2010 at 10:27 PM said...

When you wish upon a star
Makes no difference who you are
Anything your heart desires
Will come to you

If your heart is in your dream
No request is too extreme
When you wish upon a star
As dreamers do

Fate is kind
She brings to those who love
The sweet fulfillment of
Their secret longing

Like a bolt out of the blue
Fate steps in and sees you through
When you wish upon a star
Your dreams come true

*********************************

Nicole,

God has chosen you to be the guidance and guardian of this beautiful baby girl...WHY? Because he believes you can handle all that lies ahead, all that is unknown, all that would, should and could be and because he knows your heart is big enough to "let go and let God" ~
As a Mother, I cannot imagine this journey you and your family are on right now...but, I can tell you that my heart shares the concern, the compassion and hope that you are experiencing. It could be any one of us...any one of our children...and yet, we are here, praying for your daughter, your family and your strength to pull through this stronger than you ever imagined you could be...
I am reaching out to you~ because I care...because I "feel" and because I have a heart big enough to include your family as though we are all one...we are in the end. Praying for a healing and patience as God continues his work on this precious child of yours~

Sending you a warm embrace,
Nicolle Napolitano

Anonymous said...

We are praying for you and Wrenn and your entire family. May God give you the strength and peace that you need right now.

Anonymous said...

Nicole,

I am praying for you and beautiful baby Wrenn. Please go easy on yourself and trust in the love of God. You're not alone now, we are all praying for your family. God Bless.

Heidi

Anonymous said...

Nicole,
I'm sending you & your beautiful beautiful daughter all of the good vibes I can muster up & I will keep thinking of you. I can't imagine what you must be going through right now, but I hope that you can try to stay strong. Just remember you're not alone.
xo Michelle

cathy said...

Your strength is amazing. You are doing all you can and doing the best you can. What else can your sweet girl ask for? God Bless you all. She is a beautiful little girl, those pictures of her are just precious. You can tell how much Wrenn loves her mom. We are here to continue to stand by you and pray for you.

Nyx on July 22, 2010 at 11:06 PM said...

Your daughter is beautiful. Both you and your daughter are in my prayers and thoughts!

-Nyx

Anonymous said...

Thinking of you. Know that each decision you make is out of pure love, so it cannot be the wrong one. Stay strong.

<3 Alex

Ashley on July 22, 2010 at 11:14 PM said...

Hang in there! Stay strong for Wrenn! Our thoughts and prayers are with you!

Anonymous said...

Hey Nicole,

I want to echo so many of the other comments on here and say that Wrenn is so incredibly beautiful and precious. She's amazing, you're amazing. I can't imagine what you're going through, but I do know that you are strong and making decisions for your baby that can make all the difference in the world. I admire your strength and your love for Wrenn. You are a fantastic mom!
I'm praying for Wrenn, you, and your family. I pray that the doctors are knowledgeable and precise. I pray for strength and peace for you and Wrenn. I pray for healing for Wrenn.
Remember that we love you and Wrenn so so much. I know that it can be hard to be strong life is hard, but God is strong enough for any situation. He loves you. We love you.
With a big hug and lots of prayers,
Kristin

Anonymous said...

Tanner and Wrenn have an awesome family. Thank you for sharing your story. Prayers for hope, healing and strength.

Anonymous said...

I am so so sorry to hear what is happening with your family. I can't imagine how difficult this must be for you. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Wrenn is so lucky to have you both as parents.

Anonymous said...

You, Wrenn, and your family are in my heart all the way on the other side of the world in Bali. I am sending you love and intentions for healing, strength, and perseverance. Know that you are loved and taken care of.

Vinay said...

Dear Nicole and Darling Wrenn,

This message comes from a far off heart, full of love and prayers for Wrenn...you have come into this world to shower joy on your family and relatives and even strangers...you will keep on doing that and putting a smile on any face that is lucky to see you...May the Good God in turn smile on you with his divine grace and give you the strength required to stand up against all challenges life throws at you...we are with you sweet baby...

Nicole, you are a very very strong woman...and all my prayers are for you, Wrenn and your family in this time...you inspire me to stand up and face my problems...Praying for Wrenn to make a quick and healthy recovery and looking forward to read that post from you...

luv&prayers from India,
Vinay

Holly said...

Nicole, I've been looking at your site and I'm so moved by your struggle. I had my second daughter on March 29th, so when I look at her and think of how long you've been on this emotional roller coaster I'm overwhelmed for you and your family. I will pray for Wrenn - she sounds incredible and I hope all the good thoughts and support coming her way give her strength. She is loved! Hold on tight to your little boy and your husband. You are so strong!

Brianna said...

You have a beautiful daughter, I'm praying that her lungs improve and that she can come home soon. You and your family will be in my prayers. Stay strong, everything happens for a reason and soon you will find out what it is. Lots of love for you and yours :)

Emily's Moose - Karolina Kubikowska on July 23, 2010 at 3:07 AM said...

I am sure that everything will be fine and all of what both of you are going through will end very happy. You're both beautiful and you have that rare light that you sometimes see in people.. All the best!

Anonymous said...

My prayers are with you and your family.

Stephanie Motz Skinner on July 23, 2010 at 4:29 AM said...

Wow! I can't even imagine what you are going through. I pray that you will keep strong and faithful. Blessing to you and your family.

alex parker on July 23, 2010 at 5:44 AM said...

i really can't imagine how difficult this must be for you and your family.
please stay strong and keep believing everything will be ok, because that's the only way.
i'll be thinking of you!
lots of love x

Hannah said...

I cannot begin to imagine what you are going through. My love and thoughts are with your family and beautiful daughter.

Anonymous said...

Wrenn is beautiful. I can't imagine what you are going through, but I will say; I pray that Wrenn will get the transplant and live a wonderful life, and you'll forget this trauma in time.

Jes on July 23, 2010 at 8:09 AM said...

You and your family are in my prayers. Your daughter is beautiful, and so are you! Stay strong.

Anonymous said...

I really hope Wrenn makes it through because everyone deserves a normal life. Remember to stay strong and don't give up on hope. As people in my country say: "Hope dies last."

Anonymous said...

Adding my prayers to everyone elses for your dear girl and for you.

Lauren on July 23, 2010 at 9:19 AM said...

I can't even pretend to imagine what you're going through at this moment. I know the doubt and fear and worry must be so overwhelming. But you are doing the best you can for your little girl. She is so beautiful, and even though we are strangers, your story has touched my heart. I am praying for you both...that you'll have strength and hope through all of this, and that she will have her transplant and grow up to be a healthy, happy, wonderful woman.

Allison on July 23, 2010 at 9:24 AM said...

I'm praying right now for your strength and Wrenn's growth and healing and wisdom for her doctors.

Anonymous said...

I am so sorry for the pain Wrenn, you, and your family must be going through. Nobody deserves this. I really hope Wrenn gets better, I will pray for her.
Please be strong.

Anonymous said...

Wrenn's a beautiful baby. I hope the best for her and your family.

Anonymous said...

Hi, you have a beautiful daughter. You are so blessed just by being her Mommy. Be positive and kiss her kiss her kiss her kiss her kiss her...every second you can. Hold her, touch her, talk to her and kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss any and every part of her you can. You'll never regret a single one of them and they will make your heart so happy. She will feel them too. KISS her. Sending love and kisses and prayers to you and your family.

Anonymous said...

She's cuteee. :)
Hopes and prayers sent your way--
Em

m on July 23, 2010 at 12:35 PM said...

I'm praying for baby Wrenn today.

Anonymous said...

Praying for you and your beautiful daughter.

Cal on July 23, 2010 at 12:51 PM said...

Love will find its way. I wish you the best & you are in my deepest prayers.

Lauren Nicole on July 23, 2010 at 1:09 PM said...

praying for you and baby wrenn. you're an amazing mother and she's a lovely little girl, keep holding on and know that love will help and strengthen you through this tough moment in time. <3 <3
- L

Anonymous said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you and Wrenn!

P. P. on July 23, 2010 at 1:55 PM said...

Nicole,

Yourse must be one of the toughest and most challenging moments in life I could think of.
Wrenn is such a beautiful little girl. She's absolutely adorable. She's a very lucky child, to have you as her mother. Being a family is one of the most precious gift you can be given with.
It is such a sad thing knowing that this desease got in your way.

But love, and hope, are so much stronger than anything that could got in anyone's way.
And I can tell, you are full of both.
I wish you all for the best.
You two, and all your family, will be in my family prayers.

In the place I'm from, it would be really difficult to manage to donate for you. But still, I'll try. I'll do everything I can.

You have a beautiful little miracle hanging in there. Maybe her lungs are weak, but she sure has such a strong heart! ♥

Our love, and best wishes are for you all.


Macarena.

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