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Monday, October 4, 2010

Twelve Days Later

With her daughter finally breathing without assistance, Nicole was able to take the time to sit down and write a message... straight from her heart!

It's been 12 days now since Wrenn's surgery. I can honestly tell you that I've hardly had time to catch my own breath. The days and nights of 'waiting' were brutal and we did that as patiently as possible for 5 long months. But yesterday, October 3rd, my little fighter did something amazing; she is now taking her own breaths; no more oxygen. Just thinking about it makes me cry and I keep thanking God for answering all of our prayers. Jason and I feel lucky to live in a time that allowed us to give her this opportunity, even though it comes with great challenges. As I've continued to say, this is all a leap of faith.

Most of you don't know this but prior to having Tanner I had four natural miscarriages over the last 8 years. I truly feel as though Wrenn has a purpose in our lives. She is meant to be and I know she will do great things. A genetic scientist would say 'God got it wrong, he didn't catch the mistake at conception' but I know God had a plan and will continue to carry us through this journey every step of the way. I am touched every day by the support our family has received. I'm honored that Wrenn has touched YOUR lives.

But for the next few moments, there is one special family I would like to talk about...

When I was told of Wrenn's condition when she was just six weeks old, the pit of my stomach went numb. There was no chance for her to get lungs from a living donor. This meant another family would lose a child and be faced with a very difficult decision. I'm sure every mother would agree, chills go up and down your spine as you shake your head and say, 'I can't even imagine'. Every day since Wrenn's diagnosis I have thought and prayed for the donor's family. I knew something terrible would happen, five months before it happened, and found this scenario heartbreaking.

At 5 pm on the 21st of September I was told Wrenn would be getting her lungs later on that night. At that moment my voice silenced but tears flowed down both cheeks. And I immediately prayed for 'them', thanked them for the gift they had given to Wrenn, and asked God in a whisper that they'd one day be strong enough to contact us. And then I thought, maybe that's asking too much. It's hard to put yourself in their shoes and I hope I never have to. I will allow God to guide them in whatever is right for THEM.

Over the last five months I also thought of the other transplant recipients who received eyes and saw for the first time, or got off of dialysis, thanks to their new kidney. I think of that baby who had been waiting five months for a new heart and received one the same night. In several ways, Wrenn is connected to all of those same transplant babies. They share the same gift of life from one family and were all given a second chance, an opportunity to live and play, and each of these children will hopefully have a chance to one day inspire others by telling their stories.

The donor's family will ALWAYS have a special place in our hearts and I know they'll be in your hearts as well.


Erin on October 4, 2010 at 9:17 PM said...

Nicole, I read this on the second anniversary of my young cousin's death and tears immediately poured down my face. My cousin was an organ donor and we later found out that his liver healed a child. Losing Mitch was unbelievably heartbreaking, but hearing the stories of how his gift has given others life has given a purpose to his death. I hope that one day you can share Wrenn's story with her donor's family because I know that it will give them a sense of peace and joy.
I am praising God for working miracles in Wrenn's life!

Ms. Jenn said...

Oh... so true. God bless you for thinking of that family. I wait daily for my Wrenn updates. I can't even begin to imagine what all of you have gone through. I know what it feels like to have your baby go through surgery at young age, granted Brenna's was nothing as serious as Wrenn's issues, but it is still a horrible feeling. Wrenn has made me open my eyes and be even more thankful for everything I have in my life. Most importantly my kids. Thank you, and my boyfriend's mom (Lisa), for sharing Wrenn's story. It is TRULY an inspiration.

Anonymous said...

Thank you for such a beautiful, heart warming message and update. Several know you guys personally and there are stong loving hearts that followed your 5+ months story of love,heartbreak, beauty and miracle through friends and prayer request. Your strength is such an inspiration. I pray for peace and love to the family of the donor and will continue to pray for you. I miss you guys and pray for the day that you will be able to live together as a family real soon. If there is anything I can do for you please don't hesitate to ask.
Hugs and love to all of you,

Becky on October 4, 2010 at 9:53 PM said...

It is so good to read the post from you, Nicole. Along with my church and my family, I have had you all in our continual prayers and we will continue to do so. I have also been praying for the family of the one whose lungs were donated. I have thought of them often and lifted them to The Lord during this time in their life.

Thanks again for the blog post. I have been checking Facebook like crazy for updates and pictures.

You are loved!!

Susan Eisel said...

On the Sunday that I announced in Church that Wrenn had received her new lungs, a great gasp occurred from everyone in the congregation. I started off by saying that I had a PRAISE and a PRAYER REQUEST. The praise was for Wrenn and the prayer request was for the family who suffered a tragedy in their life by losing a child. Then I gave another PRAISE, and that was for the donor family. The Lord has definitely played a major role in all of this, but I also know in my heart that since the time of her birth, Wrenn has shown us what it is to have the will to live. I've tried to figure out a way to print off a copy of Wrenn's picture, both from the blog and from FB, but it hasn't worked. Someday,I'd love the opportunity to share her with my church family.
Susan Eisel, Frostburg, MD

kim verbanatz robinson on October 5, 2010 at 12:18 AM said...

Dear Nicole and Jason, I am so thrilled to hear about Wrenn's continued healing. It is so exciting to see God answer prayer! I began praying for the donor family the minute I heard! Ihave been organ donor for over 20 years. Working in the Medical field over 20 years I very well know the great need. I continue in prayer for Wrenn and you all!And expect an invitation to her Wedding, love you! cousin Kim AKA, Mrs Robinson

Just me on October 5, 2010 at 5:20 AM said...

This really brought tears to my eyes and I am SO thrilled for you!! Praise God!

Scott Price said...

As a friend of a friend, i have been Praying for Wrenn for a while now.. God definitely knows what he is doing. your attitude is a great lesson for us all.. I pray that Wrenns other family(connected by lungs) will come forward when the time is right to share in the wonderful gift that they have given.. Continued prayers to you and your whole family..

Anonymous said...

Wow...I am so touched and moved. I only know of your story through a friend but I feel close to you through prayer. With Wrenn, God has shown His power on this earth. She has gotten a lot of people praying. Also, she has a lot of us praying for the family who is suffering a loss. We may have never known that someone was out there who lost a child. And now we are all praying for them. It is truly awesome...God is good.

Anonymous said...

I found this blog a few months ago, when I was linked to it as part of a mission to drop a LoveBomb. I've been keeping up with it since, praying for your family, and when I read this today, I was so overjoyed to hear that things went ok. Your faith through this whole ordeal has been truly inspiring. Treasure your little one forever. I hope you and your family will finally be able to get back to "normal" and be able to enjoy the many joys and blessings of each day with each other. <3


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